The battle

I was thinking today (thats about one of my favourite past times) and these words just came up....i put them down. I just thought i'd put it down here too.


its a battle..... or is it?
its a war, a strong contentention
where the opinion of the contended is hardly an issue
it is tossed from one end to the other
each one wanting to be the master,ruler,king and lord

am contemplating,
"is that such a bad thing to do?"
"who would know anyway?"
"no one is harmed, so whats the big deal?"

i know the answer to those questions yet i try to deny it within,
one contender is glad, things are working the way he wants them
he is in control, he muses

am roused by the awakening of the stronger of the two contender
rising within
questioning my actions, pondering
"...he is faithful and just to forgive..."
my knees give way and tears flow freely

in that moment the feeling of peace drives all uncertainty
am back where i belong, sweet peace comforting my soul

confidence springs up again and with it the guard are let down once more
the devouring contender creeps and guilt sets in

these knees subjected once again to the usual posture, tears flow again
and peace is renewed

its a cycle am tired of, the up and down times
i cant stand no more
i want to break free forever!!